The Newest Weapons in the War on Terror

I watched some of the Sunday morning pundits discuss Ned Lamont and Joe Lieberman.

Apparently, according to Chris "King Kock" Matthews, Al Qaeda managed to sneak into Connecticut, gain citizenship in the United States, register to vote (Democrat, of course), and, through the use of special effects make up, morphed into 52% of those who voted for Ned Lamont in the Democratic Primary for the Senate.

Or, as George "Hott Sexx" Will opined, Al Qaeda had a giant raygun in Pakistan somewhere, pointed right towards Connecticut, designed to transform Decent (albeit, liberal) Americans into Zombified Peace Activists Who Are Ignorant of George McGovern and Will Destroy the Democratic Party Because Nobody in Their Right Mind Would Dare Question the Validity of the War in Iraq.

Cokie "Sugar Britches" Roberts blamed the whole debacle on the hypnotic effects of the blogosphere and the hippies--Al Qaeda operatives trained in the arts of seduction at the expense of all reason.

Rush "Roxy Contin" Limbaugh even said it was all cuz LIeberman's a Jew. I guess the moveon.org crowd are also raving country club east coast snooty bigot WASPS to boot. What a krazy dichotomy!

Very, very informative, to say the least. Before the pundits set me straight, I was kinda under the impression that regular Connecticut folks went to the polls on a Tuesday and August and simply spoke their minds at the voting booth. Boy, was I mistaken!

Really, though, this li'l primary (because that's all it was: a primary) was more than a referendum on the War on Iraq or Lieberman as Bush's Bitch; no, this was a referendum on these GODDAMN PUNDITS.

I think "the American people" have just about had it with these egomaniacal bullies reducing discourse to the narrow-minded yelling of talking points shilled out by assholes, from assholes. The pundits--pretty much all the pundits--were WRONG about this election, and they are just as out-of-touch as anybody else in DC. They're the pigs in "Animal Farm" dining with the farmers. Jealous of their power, they rail against the "blogosphere" for doing the pundit's jobs, only better. The times, they are a' changing, and it's about time.

Of course, since they were wrong, the spinning is beyond absurd. Nobody mentioned how Ned Lamont, just 4 months ago, was way way behind Lieberman in the polls and defeated not just an incumbent, but a 3-term incumbent who was also the party's VP nominee, and whose campaign was supported by the still-popular Bill Clinton. He also did it without the shitton of campaign cash Lieberman had.

But, none of that mattered. The people of CT spoke louder than all the white noise of the beltway prognosticators, and that's that. If Joe Lieberman had used even 1/10th of the tenacity he's using now in 2000 during the Florida Debacle, he probably wouldn't be the Big Loser he is today. What a Compleat Cocksmack.

So the Golden Douche Award goes to.......Joementum and the Whole Punditocracy. The End is Nigh, Bastards!